A Texas school for the mentally challenged has come under intense scrutiny this week by local law enforcement. It appears that for the past year, a group of employees has been setting up a version of Fight Club among the school's inhabitants. You just can't make this stuff up.
We, at Pterodactyl Puke, wanted to get to the bottom of this wacky story, so we sent our own Angry Max on a junket to Texas to speak to the students of the school. Angry Max was able to send the tape of his discussion.
One particular student was very open and took time out of his busy schedule (which included nap and pudding hour) to speak to Angry Max. The following is a direct interpretation of what most likely would have been said:
Angry Max: Jimmy, (name changed to protect the innocent minded) thanks for being able to speak with Ptero today. Wow, that is a pungent odor coming from where you are sitting, what is that?
Jimmy: I don't smell anything at all attributed to a lack of wiping after doin #2.
Angry Max: Ok. Now in relation to the fighting that has been going on for the past year..
Jimmy: You mean gym?
Angry Max: Yes, gym. Can you tell us about your experiences that you and your friends have gone through in "gym"?
Jimmy: Well, we all seem to be stronger than the average human. I don't know what you would call that but we have some form of extra power, completely unlabeled by middle America. A certain type of strength.
Angry Max: um......
Jimmy: I would say most of us have grown accustomed to hugging as a move.
Angry Max: Hugging? That doesnt sound so bad.
Jimmy: Would you like to me to show you how we do it?
Angry Max: Ummm, sure, go ahead. How bad could a simple hugging be?
Jimmy: Ok, here we go.
Angry Max: My, that is a strong grip. You can let go now. No seriously, let go. I can't breathe. *Gasp*, I am blacking out......
We haven't heard from Max for a few days. He missed his flight yesterday. Calls to the school have gone unanswered. I am sure he is fine.
0 comments:
Post a Comment